3000 Miles From Blowing Myself Up Into Smithereens
It's the same dilemma every night at the Dodo house. What should we have for dinner this evening? After pondering the prospects available in the freezer, I settled for garlic bread and pasta with mozzarella cheese. So I proceed to go back to the living room, plop myself down on my regular couch in front of the TV, stare at my laptop and entertain myself with some sunflower seeds.
My food arrives and I precariously chow through the grub that was badly cooked as usual. Our maid's been working as a cook for our home for over 5 years now and she still lacks any sign of possessing any culinary sense. Not that I bother complaining anymore. I gave up a long time ago.
And my phone rings.
The same old familiar number that always causes me to shudder when I see it pop up on my cell phone.
The voice at the other end of the line asks me to go to my room so we can have some 'privacy', since there was an important 'issue' they wanted to 'discuss' with me. I oblige, but only because I didn't want to go through this confrontation in front of my mom who was watching TV with me in the living room.
The important issue was so unbelievably pathetic, I couldn't help laughing at the top of my lungs. I gave my caller my 2 cents worth, over and out-ed, and went back to my place on the couch.
I knew my mom would play the same old broken record as soon as I made it through the doors of my room. 'You just wasted a whole bag of pasta and a whole bag of mozarrella. You are an ungrateful, selfish daughter. How many times have I told you to only open up a bag of cheese if you're actually intending to eat it all? Now all this food is going to waste. This is the last time i will ever buy cheese for this house. Everything always gets thrown away. Ungrateful. You think this food gets handed out for free'.
And then the real reason why she was pissed at me.
'This boy you are talking to is rude and inconsiderate. Has he no dignity or manners? Calling you at this time of night? And have you no shame laughing with him like that? I'm sure he was with his friends and had you on speaker-phone and let everyone he was with hear you laughing like that. Next thing you know he will start calling you a cheap street-girl, and telling his friends to come hear his little prostitute laughing and chatting with him on the phone. You have no self respect. Tell him if he wants anything from you, that he should keep business for when he sees you in school. Or else he has no business calling you at all in the first place'. And on and on.
I do realize that my mother gets infuriated when i roll my eyes at her hypocritical, full of bull, meaningless mumbo jumbo, and not reply when she throws her ignorant blabber at me.
What is it with you people? With your stupid propositions; your stupid 'only trying to help' suggestions; your unwanted, unasked for advice; your unwarranted accusations; your unfounded assumptions; your negativity and shallow point of views that always manage to drag everyone around you down with you. Is it anyone's fault that you see the world as such an ugly, worthless waste of time? They say children learn what they live. Maybe if you didn't get up to such vile and evil deeds, you wouldn't be seeing the world around you in such foul, hideous light.
I don't want anything to do with you. I regret ever knowing such a repulsive being. What was i thinking?
Ugh! Why is everyone getting on my case anyway? Don't you have more 'important' things to preoccupy your sad existence's with? I guess not, obviously! You have to worry about how much cheese and pasta I wasted, or who i talk to and at what time of day, or who i hang out with, as if our mere acquaintance entitles you to govern how i live my miserable life!
Poor sod..
Finally.. Let me be! All of you!
My food arrives and I precariously chow through the grub that was badly cooked as usual. Our maid's been working as a cook for our home for over 5 years now and she still lacks any sign of possessing any culinary sense. Not that I bother complaining anymore. I gave up a long time ago.
And my phone rings.
The same old familiar number that always causes me to shudder when I see it pop up on my cell phone.
The voice at the other end of the line asks me to go to my room so we can have some 'privacy', since there was an important 'issue' they wanted to 'discuss' with me. I oblige, but only because I didn't want to go through this confrontation in front of my mom who was watching TV with me in the living room.
The important issue was so unbelievably pathetic, I couldn't help laughing at the top of my lungs. I gave my caller my 2 cents worth, over and out-ed, and went back to my place on the couch.
I knew my mom would play the same old broken record as soon as I made it through the doors of my room. 'You just wasted a whole bag of pasta and a whole bag of mozarrella. You are an ungrateful, selfish daughter. How many times have I told you to only open up a bag of cheese if you're actually intending to eat it all? Now all this food is going to waste. This is the last time i will ever buy cheese for this house. Everything always gets thrown away. Ungrateful. You think this food gets handed out for free'.
And then the real reason why she was pissed at me.
'This boy you are talking to is rude and inconsiderate. Has he no dignity or manners? Calling you at this time of night? And have you no shame laughing with him like that? I'm sure he was with his friends and had you on speaker-phone and let everyone he was with hear you laughing like that. Next thing you know he will start calling you a cheap street-girl, and telling his friends to come hear his little prostitute laughing and chatting with him on the phone. You have no self respect. Tell him if he wants anything from you, that he should keep business for when he sees you in school. Or else he has no business calling you at all in the first place'. And on and on.
I do realize that my mother gets infuriated when i roll my eyes at her hypocritical, full of bull, meaningless mumbo jumbo, and not reply when she throws her ignorant blabber at me.
What is it with you people? With your stupid propositions; your stupid 'only trying to help' suggestions; your unwanted, unasked for advice; your unwarranted accusations; your unfounded assumptions; your negativity and shallow point of views that always manage to drag everyone around you down with you. Is it anyone's fault that you see the world as such an ugly, worthless waste of time? They say children learn what they live. Maybe if you didn't get up to such vile and evil deeds, you wouldn't be seeing the world around you in such foul, hideous light.
I don't want anything to do with you. I regret ever knowing such a repulsive being. What was i thinking?
Ugh! Why is everyone getting on my case anyway? Don't you have more 'important' things to preoccupy your sad existence's with? I guess not, obviously! You have to worry about how much cheese and pasta I wasted, or who i talk to and at what time of day, or who i hang out with, as if our mere acquaintance entitles you to govern how i live my miserable life!
Poor sod..
Finally.. Let me be! All of you!
posted by Extinct Dodo at 2:14 AM
11 Comments:
feeeeh wa7dah m6yriah tes2al wa7dah sheeenah( ugly ) tgool lha awladek thola taw2am (twins), radt 3aleha alsheenah la wa7ed 7 yrs o althane 10 yrs, bas '3areeeb so2alk ma3 anhom ma ytshabhoon.
galt lha alm6yriah: many m9adgah anek anakty ( get fucked ) marteen.
hahahaaay katoom.. thanks for the laugh, even though it was lame :p
HEllo DoDo wesh hal klam el zeen 6b3an 6b3an whatever i say akeed shahadty mjroo7a u really know how to write oo dyeem dyeem ktabtik t3jebni oo foog ketha ykfe ur being a good teacher oo u help me alot in writtin mshllh keep going u write poems in english soo i think ay shy thani ra7 ykoon 3liki easyy mrra teftef b5re nfsek bs lol BEST WISHES WEDDOO
loool weddo ya 7by lik sis :* :* :*
even though it's completely irrelevent to my post, i appreciate the compliments and ego boost :P
and shhh about the help ya dil5a i dont want kl mn hab oo dab asking me for favours :|
Nyahahaha Nice post! I shoulda so guessed you were a gemini :)
jitterbug welcome to my blog gurl! :)
yeah only a true gemini would know how a fellow starsign's mind ticks :p
lol..you lunatic. :P
lol i love you too yal sushi ba6al :P
a daydreamer.. shiftay shlon :(
and then she goes on and on about how fat i am and how i should lose weight or else i wont ever get married
phttttttttt
Before I forget, what does 'shino' mean? You used that word a couple of times and I never understood what it meant.
I would agree with your mom on the 'not wasting' food bit. I mean com'n, I'm sure there is a way you can eat and not waste...
But about the laughing with the boy part, I don't think it was any of her business. I mean you are a big girl, an adult and you know how to deal with your men ;)
It is great to have you back, love your writing style :)
dotty.. shino is equal to aish or wisho; basically it means 'what' :p
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